Writer's Block: Girls and Boys
Jun. 26th, 2012 10:37 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
jennythereader[Error: unknown template qotd]
I think comprehensive sex ed in age-appropriate language and detail from both the schools and the parents should start several years before puberty (age 7 or so). It should start this early for the same reason you have fire drills and tornado drills and other emergency plans: because you want the safe behavior to be the automatic behavior, the behavior they fall back on when fear or excitement or hormones have them too mixed up to think properly. To my mind, abstinence only sex ed is the equivalent of trying to keep kids safe from fire by telling them not to play with matches. It's a good first step, but it won't keep them safe when there's smoke in air.
The schools should focus on it from a scientific/medical/basic mechanics angle, while the parents should focus on the emotional, moral, and ethical aspects. Not being either an educator or a parent, I don't know exactly what should be discussed (or in what words) at what age.
I do think that one specific element that should start early and be emphasized at all ages and to both genders is that you are always allowed to say "NO" to any sexual behavior (and conversely, that when someone says "NO," you listen to them and stop), and if someone doesn't stop when you tell them to, you should tell an authority figure. Obviously this should also get more nuanced as the kids get older, addressing things like people trying to use guilt, fear, chemicals, or other means to get sex without the other person having the opportunity to say yes or no.
I'm not sure how much sense this makes. I may be editing for clarity later on. If I do, I'll try to note what I changed.
I think comprehensive sex ed in age-appropriate language and detail from both the schools and the parents should start several years before puberty (age 7 or so). It should start this early for the same reason you have fire drills and tornado drills and other emergency plans: because you want the safe behavior to be the automatic behavior, the behavior they fall back on when fear or excitement or hormones have them too mixed up to think properly. To my mind, abstinence only sex ed is the equivalent of trying to keep kids safe from fire by telling them not to play with matches. It's a good first step, but it won't keep them safe when there's smoke in air.
The schools should focus on it from a scientific/medical/basic mechanics angle, while the parents should focus on the emotional, moral, and ethical aspects. Not being either an educator or a parent, I don't know exactly what should be discussed (or in what words) at what age.
I do think that one specific element that should start early and be emphasized at all ages and to both genders is that you are always allowed to say "NO" to any sexual behavior (and conversely, that when someone says "NO," you listen to them and stop), and if someone doesn't stop when you tell them to, you should tell an authority figure. Obviously this should also get more nuanced as the kids get older, addressing things like people trying to use guilt, fear, chemicals, or other means to get sex without the other person having the opportunity to say yes or no.
I'm not sure how much sense this makes. I may be editing for clarity later on. If I do, I'll try to note what I changed.
no subject
Date: 2012-07-02 03:00 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-07-02 01:52 pm (UTC)Probably it should wait until kids are a little older, and already have a good understanding of the basic mechanical and biological aspects, but just before the hormones really kick in.
My basic theory is that if you give kids the facts before they hit puberty they'll probably make smarter decisions, because the foundation they base those decisions on will be stronger.
no subject
Date: 2012-07-02 05:14 pm (UTC)